My goodness. Whatever just flew into my eye infected me. I think I have herpes of the eye or something. I feel a little bump on my eyelash ridge. Gross!!


Oh, suck it up. Sharing is caring, fool.


I'm going to discuss Jake now. I've been meaning to, but my mind has been, um, preoccupied...
This is what went down a few nights ago...a reinactment if you will:

Ian: I know someone who likes you
Me: I know someone who likes me too
Chrissy: EVERYONE likes Sandra...
Ian: This is true, but Jake likes her in a "more than just wanting to talk to her" sort of way...


In other words, he wanted to 'get up in it and hit it harder than De La Hoya' (seriously, if you know where that is from, I'm slightly embarassed for the both of us...). So, yeah- no Jake. Also- I found out tonight that he's back with an ex-girlfriend who none of his friends like. "He was desperate," says Ryan. Poor horny boys. I do not feel sorry for any of them.

Sex can wait- masterbate! Don't practice birth control, practice self-control.

Yeah, that's all I've got. Keep it in your pouch, kangaroo boy.

STOP EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!


::Something just flew into my eye::


...ok...all better.




~Carry on~

Hmmm. I have an inconsistant personality? Yes, I suppose I do.


School Sandra: shy, quiet, well-behaved

Zoo Sandra: wacky, insane, mischievous



I think I'm actually a happy medium between the two. I like to laugh and have fun, but I have to be comfortable to be overtly so. Wacky is how Ben always describes me. He knows me from many perspectives, except school, so he doesn't really know me as shy. I don't know, I'm a complicated gal. When I went to Mickey's the other night w/ Ryan's posse, Jake and Josh were like, "Matt and Ryan keep telling us that you're crazy, but we haven't seen you do much." (yes- they said it in unison) and Matt was like, "Oh, she's insane. She's the craziest person I know..." So, who knows. I'm definitely the weirdest person I know, but that makes it fun. I suppose, besides Chrissy, Suzie, Stephy, Jess, and Renee- Matt would know. We do have a history after all.

Speaking of Matt, I don't hate him so much anymore. I've learned to forgive and forget. He still annoys me now and then, but not as much as before. He's back to being my pal.


Anyways- October has been a self-analyzation month or something, because I have been doing alot of it. Sooooo, yeah. WOOT. =)

I just realized that if the cursor/arrow thing (???) rests over a bracket, that a little bracket pops up. Wow- thank you?? That's like the hanging monkey in the gift shop- "Yi Min (pronounced "Yi Min") is from China..." I mean, no pronunciation marks or anything. Randomness, yo, much randomness.

Speaking of the zoo, apparently I go to Richland University now. Thanks, Mike. He's really bad at phone announcements when he has Sarah and I constantly distracting him... not that we were doing that or anything. We do our best at making him sound like a moron. Maybe we'll flash him next time...

...our teeth, you perv. Teeth! We'll flash him our pearly whites. You're a dirty, dirty person. Go give me five Hail Mary's and maybe then you will be forgiven.


Wha cha!

"Your hair looks really cute tonight. You should do that more often..."

Comments like that crack me up. It's like, a nice insult. Whenever someone says something like that, they just set themselves up for a "What are you trying to say, Megan? Are you saying my hair looks like crap all the time?? Is that what you're trying to say?" Poor Megan. I gave her a hard time for that comment. I was only teasing because I was in a good mood tonight. My hair was lookin' pretty cute tonight, though. Yup.


Hmmm. I feel so fine, I feel so elated...

Grrr. My thing just got erased...
Anyways- it went something like this.


So, the speech thing wasn't so bad. I know where I need to improve, and that's good. It was a bonding experience, that's for sure. The girls I stayed with were, well, not like me at all. That's not a bad thing, it was just an adjustment. They were all drinking and smoking, and I was not. I felt so goody-goody, but I didn't let it get to me. I just read my book (Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk. It's sooo good...), and let them amuse me with their drunken antics. Plus, they described me as mysterious. I like that. I've always wanted to be mysterious. Woot!

This just in (and this is so sad that it's funny, but it is...):


Chrissmarie: I think my roomies gonna tell me shes prego
SJGBluClu3: uh oh
Chrissmarie: phew
Chrissmarie: she may just have gonorrhea
SJGBluClu3: i think, sadly, that's the funniest thing i've read
Chrissmarie: sadly, I agree
SJGBluClu3: i'm rolling
Chrissmarie: stop that
SJGBluClu3: i'm sorry!
Chrissmarie: its probably a very scary situation
SJGBluClu3: i'm sure it is
SJGBluClu3: but because it isn't me, and i'm insensitive like that...
SJGBluClu3: it's kinda funny
Chrissmarie: lol
Chrissmarie: it is


Anyways... I decided that I'm back to my old geek-in-the-corner self. I'm happy to be back. I haven't been hit on in awhile, and I like it. Too much stress comes along with boys, anyways. Oh, but if an opportunity were to come along, I wouldn't shoo it away. I'd take it on chillaxed-like. Yes- chillaxed-like. No need for drama.


P.S. I'm feelin' waaaaay pimpish this evening. =) That was for you R-dawg.

Oi vey. I have my first speech competition tomorrow. I'm nervous. Wish me luck! [insert sucking noise here] Did ya hear that?? That was the sound of me, um, sucking...




























Yikes.

Every muscle in my body aches. I'm so worn out. BATZ is killing me! All I wanna do is sleep, but I have stuff to do, yo. LOTS of stuff! Aaaah!

So, anyways- I still want to beat up the person I was supposed to beat up, but for other reasons. She's at such an annoying age. I don't understand how someone could be that annoying. Gah!

Besides the fact that it's killing me, Boo has been fun this year. The volunteers that I've rounded up have been stinking awesome! They're so good at this stuff! Yay for RCC kids. They're alot more fun than they are given credit for. Only, I already knew that, so ummmm.

I don't know. I'm tired. I'm gonna go lie down somewhere for a 1/2 hour, and then I'm off to school!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
*breathe*
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





*phew* I feel better now. Slightly- I'm going to beat someone up tonight. Yup. Then I'll feel waaaay better.

Hooray! I have a stalker! Ian is gonna stalk me...

FOR FREE!!!!


Yay.

Oh my. Why is my life such a drama? It isn't, really, but for me it is. Boys boys boys. They're everywhere all of a sudden!! Aaaaahhh!! I want to go back to being the geek in the corner that no boy ever noticed. I don't know how to go back there, though. I haven't changed any. At least, I really don't think I have. I just put a hat on. That's it. A hat. A beanie, for Pete's sake! Guh!

So, anyways, I really like two boys. They are so different, too, so it's kinda weird. The things they do have in common are that they are nice, funny, and rock stars. Of course they are. Tee hee. I don't know if they "like me like that" or not, though. Ick, I hate this.

P.S. Jake is NOT one of them. Poor boy... I'm a horrible horrible person.


Now, I'm gonna make a list of reasons for each one as to why I like them, and then why I shouldn't like them.

Boy #1:

Likes-
plays guitar in an awesome band, fuunnnnaaaay, fun, thinks I'm funny, awesome smile, crookedly cute teeth, super nice, tall, is gonna be really good at whatever he wants to do in life, is in school to get there, OLDER THAN ME (woot), makes direct eye contact, shy sometimes- sometimes, has awesome friends, we like the same music, doesn't smoke, motivated, gives me that funny feeling in my tummy, open-minded, sincere, I've only known him a couple months but I've learned alot about him since then, makes me smile, etc...

Dislikes-
sometimes a little too nice, set in his ways, oblivious, is in love with a girl that does not love him back (of course he is), has NO IDEA that I like him (at least I don't think he does), I haven't known him all that long, and he prolly just likes me as a friend.


Boy #2:

Likes-
plays guitar in an awesome band, fuunnnnaaaay, fun, thinks I'm funny, awesome smile, great laugh, fantastic teeth, short, his best friend is one of my favorite people, really nice, we have severe "moments" when we look at each other (sigh), rock star arms (swoon), he has a fun voice, he's the first person I notice when I see that groupie, gives me that funny feeling in my tummy, makes direct eye contact, I really like him, etc...

Dislikes-
he's so "metal" and I'm so not, smokes, a little closed-minded (he made a "ghetto-person" comment the other night that bugged me, but I called him on it...), I'm not sure if the whole "thang" we had going on the other night was for real or if it was just him flirting with the girl that his friend likes (I say this because my friends and I do this- it's a bad habit, yo), his friend likes me which could lead to drama if anything were to happen, and he prolly just likes me as a friend.



POOP!!!! I'm becoming a nun, yo. =)

What am I doing tonight?? Well, what are YOU doing tonight? Hehe.


So... First day of BATZ (Boo at the Zoo) was yesterday. I wanted to go run and play with Mindy and Renee, but Mike stuck me in the gift shop. Poop. Actually, it worked out because it started to rain and everyone else got soaked. I was all dry and roasty-toasty in the gift shop. Suckas!! Woot.

I was supposed to go get pierced today, but I had a prior commitment that I had forgotten about. It was fun, but my goodness I have never gotten so dirty. I had to wander my way through a dense fog of dust for a couple hours. Let's just say that when all was done and I went to blow my nose... I was pretty embarrassed for my nose- ashamed even. I don't want to know where else the dust managed to wedge itself, but I bet it got pretty obscene. Oh well. Diane bought Chrissy and me some Steak and Shake, so it was all good.

Soooo, STEPHY IS HOME FOR FALL BREAK!!!!! I hadn't see her in forever. Horray! I miss you, Stephanie Thompson. Come home more often! We'll go on more dates- One Kiss, No Tongue! Hehe. I love you, but I don't want to know you for fear of begetting. You slut. =)


A whole lotta schnoot is gonna go down tonight, so I will get back to you and give you my weekend update! Yip!

*phew*


I found Jessica. All is well in the land. =)

Jessica Crump, where are you at?!?!?!?

Your Daily Horoscope for October 17, 2002

Dear Sandra,
One couldn't really say, Sandra, that it is very difficult for you to make decisions in your love life. You are a passionate person and you believe in love at first sight. You are probably the most spontaneous lover of the Zodiac! And you are entering a period in which your emotions will be on fire! All the elements are there, Sandra, to ignite your creativity in every aspect of your life!



SIGH. How interesting, considering I was just bitten hard by the smitten kitten. I'll explain to anyone who asks, but you will definitely agree...
This Jake fella has some competition, that's for gosh-darned sure.

I found my blue bra!!! Hooray!!!!

I said "BRRRR" it's cold outside...


I don't know how the rest of that goes. *tear* So, I didn't get around to dropping the class today. I'm gonna do it tomorrow, for real though. Next semester will be HELL, but I'll deal. Things will work out somehow, they always do. Just the way my life is. I take my magic for granted sometimes, but really I do appreciate my luck. I'm just a lucky fool sometimes. What what.

Sooo. I got some new nailpolish today. It's called "Pink Aura". Tee hee. I'm acquiring too many pink things these days. I'm so girly! I have a pink hat, a pink shirt (I'm wearing it tomorrow...), and now pink nailpolish. What's up with that?!?

Tomorrow I'm gonna have a talky-talk with Matthew about this Jake business. I need to learn more about the fella. While I have already decided to give him a chance (if he isn't a weinie), I would still like to know what I'm getting myself into.

Boys are dumb. Bah. =)

I'm in such a weird mood right now. Just a warning...


So, I'm gonna drop my math class tomorrow. When did I gain a lack of motivation??? The thing is, I'm failing this class beyond repair. Gah! I don't quite know what this will do to the financial aid part, since it is after midterm and all, buuuuut it's better than failing. I'm gonna have to play supa-hard catch up next semester, and I'm gonna be way stressed out. Aaaah! I wish that I were always a screw-up so that this wouldn't be so traumatic for me. Why, oh why was I freaking good at everything in school K-12? I couldn't have messed up a couple times? Just for variety?? Bah! My life story could be on a Fox TV show... "When Smart Kids Go Dumb: A Tale of a Troubled Youth". Um, or something like that.

I need sleep. Too much drama!!! Too much drama!!!

SIGH

A COMPLICATED breakdown of events:


So... boys... I don't know what the dilly is. A boy has admitted outloud to someone that he likes me. I guess it's something new and different, so it's kinda overwhelming. *Sigh*

So, the boy is one of Ryan's friends. That whole group is so cool and fun to hang out with. I just don't know if I'd necessarily date the one that likes me. I do think that I might give him a trial run or something. I mean, I don't know anything about him. I know his first name, where he lives, and that he manages Ryan's band. That's it! I don't know how old he is, what his last name is (which, by the way, could break this boy), or any other important stuff!
I know I am totally overanalyzing anything and everything that has to do with my current situation, but I am a girl and it's what I do. Bah! I really wish my life were simple...

Also, I know why girls drive boys so crazy. I'm being a difficult girl to more than one boy, and I apologize. Guh! Boys are dumb, girls are dumb. Poop!

Holy cow, it's been awhile!

Whew! I have been a busy busy girl since last Wednesday...

A SIMPLE breakdown of events:


Thursday- Went to the OKGo/RHV show with Renizzle and Chrissy. It was so super fantastic! I LOVE both of those bands...

Friday- Oh, Friday...* Post Cram Jam was stinkin' awesome. It was so much fun! I had ALL of my friends there, I made a couple new ones, I laughed, I schmoozed... it was great fun. Plus, it was Vagina Day. Ow ow!

Saturday/Sunday- Can I just say how awesome Ryan Kirkland is? I love that guy. He's gonna teach me to play guitar for real! Woot!

Today- Boo-at-the-Zoo decorating... Gah!* Then, I went w/ my mother to visit my sister in Champaign. It was surprisingly painless...



*More info soon in the COMPLICATED breakdown of events...

I thought of another one!

9. When you are singing a random song, and then it either comes on the radio or TV.

I don't have anything deep or insightful to say at the moment, so beware of rambling...

I need money. I'm poor, yo. Things are expensive these days, and I have to keep up! I'm livin' a Coca Cola lifestyle on a Sam's Choice budget. Er, um, something like that...

So, I wrote Renee's phone number on my hand in permanent marker yesterday, and it's still there. I feel like a playa. I'ze got my hizoes digits all up in this mizug. Tiiiieeeght.

Oh oh! I know what I'm gonna do! I'm going to make a list of things that happen all the time and freak me out a little...

1. When two cars of the same make/brand and of the same color are driving around each other.

2. When two people on two different buddy lists sign on at the same time, and I know that there is no way that they know each other, and then sign off at the same time.

3. When everytime I look at a clock it's 3:33 or 11:11 (except after 6:00. Then things are normal).

4. When I have days where it seems like it's "Past and Present Crush Day". These are days when I consecutively see pretty much every boy I have ever had a crush on. Even boys that I haven't seen in forever. This only happened once over the summer, and it freaked me out!

5. When I pass people in my car, and they end up being people I haven't seen since grade school or something.

6. When two people IM me at the same time! (Just happened... stop that!)

7. Small-worldness. (y'all know what I'm talking about)

8. Meeting someone who is exactly like you, only in male form. Creepy!

Ummm. I'm out of weird things. Tell me if you can think of anymore and I'll blog it up, fool! =)

I smell like lawn mower.

Woot! I'm excited about Thursday through Tuesday. I'll give you predictions of what will go down...

Thursday- OkGo/RHV show with Renizzle and Chrissy! Poser will have a band practice, by the way- make note you two. =)

Friday- *Post Cram Jam* Double woot! All my friends will be there, rockin' bands will be playing, I'm working concessions (eh), and it will just be supa dupa fun!

Saturday- B&T, baby! Ow ow! This will be some good ol' fashioned Sandra and the zoo boys fun. I do believe the last time the five of us got together was around this time last year. My goodness. Dumb gift shop. Creepy Ron with the overly chapped lips was also around this time, but he was creeeeeeepy. *shudder* However, he is working in the greenhouse, so we might have Creepy Ron flashbacks. Duh duh duhhhhh. I wonder if he ever bought some Carmex?? Hmm.

Sunday- ditto, baby, dih toe.

Monday- No freaking school!!!!! Aaaaaah!!! I think my mother and I are gonna go to Champaign to spend some quality time w/ my sister. It's been awhile. July was the last time I was over at her place. wow.

Tuesday- No freaking school!!!!! AGAIN!!!!! That will be the best day ever. I'm missing Chemistry! Viva!!!!

Due to my overuse of exclamation points this blog, I have decided to end it here. I have used up my EP privileges...


Oh, by the way, R-dawg. The word we couldn't think of was "tainted". Ex: She's all tainted and whatnot. =)

Oh yeah- I have lost my favorite bra. It's so comfy and it makes my boobs look cute! Plus, it's blue. I've lost my blue bra!!!! This is quite a stressfull situation. It's most certain that I didn't leave it at anyone's house because I'm not really a slut, I just play one on TV. Anyways- $5 handjobs don't involve bras, you silly! You kids these days...


So, yeah. I am wearing bras that are just mediocre. They don't compare to the blue one! How will I survive?! I must, though. I must! Oh woe is me!

I'm not well! I'm ill. I'm so ill. Ok, not on-my-death-bed ill, but whine-and-groan-and-moan ill. My head hurts, my throat hurts, my ears hurt, etc... Now that I think of it, I bet you Jerrod Burris gave it to me!!!! He was sick Thursday, and I hung out w/ him for a good hour or so! Dumb sick boy. I bet he heavily breathed in my direction as he was leaving so as to infect me with his germs. It's his evil plan to take over the world. Why me, you ask? Why not me? I am SO world-dominating material...

~please note that I am not well! Everything you have just read is influenza-induced jibberish. Jibberish! Where's my Nyquil, fool??~

What obscure band are you?

So, I changed my mind about Bezinizzle. If he were to ask me out, I would say no. He doesn't give me that funny feeling in my tummy or any of that business. Although, if he were to ask me to his prom, I would prolly say yes- which I think he might because I think he was going to last year...
Ben: "So, I've got this prom thing coming up..."
Me: "Neat- see ya later!"
Yes, that was mean, which is why I would say yes this time around. Only as friends, of course. We would do something fun like dye our hair multi-colors and go in funky prom attire. It would be crazy-fun, yo.


So... I haven't got much else to say except that next week is gonna rock my socks! Thursday night is a RHV/OK Go show! Renizzle, Chrissy, and myself will be going. Woot! Suzie and her Bradley peeps may also make an appearance so it'll be supa fun. Then Friday night is *Post Cram Jam*! (I still have tickets, by the way, if someone would like to purchase one...) Hooray for fun rock shows two nights in a row! Then, oh then, I have to work 9-7 on both Saturday and Sunday. That's a long day, yes it is, but I'm somewhere other than the gift shop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm on B&T, baby. I'm happy. No wait- gleeful. I was about to stage an act of mutiny if I had to work in the gift shop one more time. Actually, no I wasn't. I've only been working in the mofo every day since the beginning of time. If I were to mutinize (mute? mutiny?), I would have done it a long time ago. Yup.

Peace. I'm out. Keep it hood, y'all. =)

...and I know you know I'm fly.

Happy Birthday, Ryan! (he will probably never ever read this, but I felt the need to tell him anyways)

I'm at RCC right now, sitting next to beautiful rock star boy. *swoon* Wait- he just left. Nevermind...

So, I am having a rotten day. Rotten! First, math sucks. For real. I don't fail (I do, actually, but I'm in severe denial about it), but kids, let's just say that we have three tests left, and even if I were to get a 100% on every one, I would still have a C. Seeing how that will not happen, I think I might have to drop the class. This sucks, because the class is 5 credits. That would mean that for this semester, I would have only 9 credit hours. I don't even think that's full time! I'm going to be here forever! That would mean that next semester, I would have to take 21 hours to transfer. That's like 7 classes! I could take summer classes again and I think I might. My mom and sister are going to kill me. They'll blame it on me going to too many rock shows and all that business, but really- I've only been to one all semester! One! So, I blame it on my lack of motivation, diminishing attention span, and a horrible horrible teacher.

That was my failing vent... Next rotten thing to happen- I go to Taco Bell to get a nachos supreme (w/ no meat, mind you), and so I put the little box on my lap as I drive away, and as I'm turning (which you all know how I turn...), all of the contents of the box fly out of it, in between my seats, on the seats, on the floor, on my purse, etc... The only thing left in the box- two chips. Not even a smidge of cheese! Oh I was so mad! I cleaned up as much as I could, but the damn sour cream/tomato/bean/chive mix seeped into unreachable crevaces in between the seats. So now- it smells. Oh how it smells! I think I smell right now, which may be why beautiful boy left. *tear* Actually, I think he was just done w/ whatever he was doing. He gave me a half-grin as he left, so it's all good. =)

Hmm- I wonder if it would look weird if I were to switch computers to see if anyone is on AIM... I'm going to anyway! Bah! =)

I'm reevaluating my life plans. I know, I know- pick a life path already! Well, Mom, I want to be a writer. This whole bio "thing" I've had going on for the past 9 years or so just isn't working out for me these days. a) I hate math. I can factor all the live-long day, but past that it bores me out of my mind. b) Bio stuff just isn't as interesting as it used to be. I can read about it, but I don't know if I want to do it. c) I like to write, and I'm not too bad at it. d) Being either a journalist for National Geographic or Rolling Stone and such would kick ass! e) I like literature and all that business, so ain't no thang. and f) My attention span has regressed back to 3rd grade or something, and I just don't want to grasp any difficult concepts anymore. I guess you could say I have given up or something, but I haven't. I still want to save the world and have a day named after me, but I can still do that, yo. We gotta have dreams, and I will so totally find a way. Now that the motivational speaker inside me has spoken, I will discuss something else...

I have...oh dear me...an addiction. *sob* I colored my hair again tonight. It is not "Hooker-Hair Red", although I was for real tempted, but I do believe the color I got was called, "Spiced Harvest". I like it. The black still refuses to leave, so it is "I'm-Goth-Really-I-Am Black" slash "Spiced Harvest". I have about 2 inches of "Spiced Harvest" roots, and the rest of the top is "I'm-Goth-Really-I-Am Black". It makes me laugh, but I enjoy it. Woot! I almost went back to "Luscious Mango", but then I remembered that the smell of my head woke me up at night, so I'm spicy instead. Wha cha! (that was my spicy-hair noise...)


PS. Ryan Kirkland's b-day is tomorrow. Wish him a happy 19th!