Want to cheat the system and get free checks? Here's how:


Step One-

Find some checks that suit your fancy from an advertisement in the newspaper and send for them with all the required items, except DO NOT void out a deposit slip. Simply forget to do so. This causes them to send a paper that the bank has to sign.

Step Two-

Forget about the paper for a good month or so. This causes the check people to think that you have forgotten about them, and they send your money back in the form of a check.

Step Three-

Have the bank sign the paper and send it to the check people.

Step Four-

Cash the check they sent you.

Step Five-

Repeat step one- only do everything correctly: void what needs to be voided, send what needs to be sent, etc...



After you have done these five easy steps, you will get not one, but two, yes TWO boxes of checks, for the price of one. I guess they got the paper and sent me that set, forgetting that they had sent my money back. It's cool though. I won't need to get new checks for a good long while, though. I bet I'll get caught somehow, but for now... I cheated the system! Viva la revolution! I'm bringing the man down, one step at a time. Booyah!


So, my teacher was supposed to be gone the rest of the week because of knee surgery. He told us that we wouldn't have class. I get home tonight and have two messages waiting for me. "Your Art 111 class will be meeting tomorrow......Your Art 101 class will be meeting Friday." Double bunk! I was looking forward to sleeping in. 9 am everyday is for the motivated kind. I ain't that kind.


Sledding Friday. You should come. Give me a ringy-dingy, because I like it when you call me. Mostly because you're hot, but second mostly because you have a nice ass. Rowr. Shake it!

PS. Stop, drop, and roll doesn't work in HELL!!!! (on a billboard outside of a church)

Sorry for the delayed blog.

Our first project in design involves cutting and pasting. Consider me giddy. I am so good at this game! What we have to do is do a metamorphasis of one object to another through shapes. It has to be gradual and at least 8 steps. I'm doing a swan (it was supposed to be a duck, but it looks like a swan) into a flower. I am on a roll too. Mr. Rocha was impressed. I can't do it in just 8 steps though. I've got too much going on. I'm on step six and it looks like I'm going to need at least five more before it's good to go. That's ok, though. This is good times.

You know what I think is funny? When I tell the truth, but someone doesn't believe me and thinks I'm joking, because they must believe that I'm not that type of person. They've stereotyped me, but in the positive way, I guess. Looks aren't always what they seem.

I've got sad news. My boobs have gotten bigger. I went up a bra size. When you look at them, they don't look that big in comparison with other girls. Sure, they're noticeable, but they're not gonna win a fight against Pamela Anderson. This makes me wonder what size the bigger-boobed ladies wear. I mean, I didn't think there was much after the size I wear, so what are they wearing?? And how much are they spending on their bras? Because, as girls know, bras are not cheap, and the bigger they get- the pricier they get. I think it's madness! Girls, let's go burn our expensive bras some day! Women's liberation!!!!

*insert baby fist pushing through the air*

Zach and I rented Vanilla Sky last night. I will admit that I never saw the movie merely because Tom Cruise was in it. I didn't know that Cameron Crowe had directed it. Had I known that, it would have become one of my favorites long ago. It was really good. I was impressed. I'm going to have to watch it again, though, because I was making Chrissy and Suzie's birthday presents during it, so sometimes I was distracted. It was good times, though.

I recently purchased the Ben Folds Live CD. It rocks my piano-banging world. When he plays "Army", he splits the audience up into a "bitchin' horn section". It's friggin' amazing. I laugh, I cry, I dance. It's magical.

My sister went to San Francisco to visit a guy that she graduated with. Apparently they're getting together now, or something. See, this kid- Brian Clouser is his name- was a nerd in high school. My sister was a cheerleader. In the life of high school, this is why they never got together. I guess he had a crush on her back in the day, as any nerd would have on a pretty popular cheerleader, but of course- my sister was dating Jamie Logan. Who, while not a jock like he should fit into this story as, but a popular "bad boy" who fits into another teen movie. Brian is now some electronics expert in California. Jamie is now a loser. Good move, sis. Anyway- they met back up at their high school reunion, and as luck would have it, they were the ONLY two in their class who were not married/divorced/with child/grown up. It's fate, I tell you! I do want to call him and warn him that my sister is mean to boys. She has had "pretty girl syndrome" all her life. Boys flock to her, but she's oblivious and unintentionally breaks their heart. She goes for the jerks and then gets hurt and ends up being meaner and meaner to the nice boys. Brian is a nice guy. I haven't seen him since they graduated, but I remember him having red hair with random cowlicks, brown eyes, and lots of freckles- very Opie. I hope that things work out, though. It's time for my sister to come to her senses, and stop being the stereotypical pretty girl that she can be. I think that my sister is beautiful. She's even beautiful in a nonconventional sort of way. I think she knows she's pretty, but doesn't think she is- if that makes any sense. She's turning 30 next week, and her milkshake still brings all the boys to the yard. Anyway- she and Brian would make cute babies. I approve.

It's cold outside, and that's an understatement. Viva la scarf!

School has been A-OK. I'm enjoying being artsy. Ryan Kirkland is in my drawing class, and he makes things easier for me. I don't much like to draw. I'd rather cut, paste, and paint. Ryan makes the class more fun. It's a good thing that I like my teacher too. He's making things easier as well. I get nervous for some reason when drawing, but he makes me laugh at myself and ease up a bit. It's a good time.
Design is also tons o' fun. Katrina Fisher is in there with me. She's my makeout buddy. We actually hung out a lot today and chatted and laughed. Yay for her.

I forgot to mention in the last blog that after watching Mona Lisa Smile, I forgot my purse in the theater. Amy and I went back to get it, but it was too late and they had closed all up. Zach went and got it the next day, and all of my money had been stolen. Even the change! I know it was one of the workers, because there were only 3 other people in there with us, and it was a late movie. I'm pretty sure I know who it was too. Hey Chrissy, remember "Charlie the Catholic Hater"? Yeah, he worked there that night, and I'm fairly certain it was him. I see him at school now and then. I want to hold my purse up when he's around and be like- "Remember this, ASS?!? I hope you used my $17 for something useful, like a knife to cut yourself."
...ok, so I wouldn't be that vile. I'll curse him with genital warts and 3 flat tires.

Chrissy and I ended up reading the same book on the same day. How friggin' creepy is that. The book is The Perks of Being a Wallflower. I really loved this book. It's in my top 5 of favorites. I want to put a paragraph on this from it, but I left it in my car. Perhaps I'll do it tomorrow. I really related with the main character on the depression level. He said exactly how I feel sometimes. Our depressions were for similar but very different reasons, but yet they seem to convey the same emotions. The book made me cry sometimes, but yet it made me laugh too. The bad part was that the one day I was waiting for 70 hours in the financial aid office, I was reading the part that made me cry. I was all weeping while I waited. That's probably a reason why I got all frustrated afterwards and cried. I wasn't able to get it all out then.

Anyway, reading that book made me want to get things out, so every once and awhile I'll confess something that either no one, or very few people know. Here's the first one:

I cry a lot. I don't like to do it in front of anyone, so I cry most of the time while driving, or right before I go to sleep. I cry because I think too much. I think about sad things all the time. I cry when I watch movies, because something- even happy things- makes me think of something sad. For instance, my mom and I went to see Cheaper by the Dozen. It was a really cute movie with fun, happy things going on. I cried during parts of it. The reason I cried was because I started to think of sad things. I started thinking about my mom and how very lonely she must be. I thought about how ok the mom in the movie was going to be, if something were to happen to her husband, because she was a great mom and all twelve of her kids loved her. I then started to think that all of the kids have each other too, and it made me sad. As you all know, my mom and I don't get along, and I probably won't visit home that often. My sister is nine years older, so we have two very seperate lives, and we probably won't see each other that often. It just made me sort of sad and lonely. That's another thing that makes me sad, and cry sometimes. Lonely people make me sad. The outcasts in movies and books make me sad. It's odd, but Milton in Office Space, and one of the lonely teachers in Mona Lisa Smilemake me sad.
Sometimes at night I start thinking about bad things that could happen in the far and near future. I think about what would happen to me if either my mom or sister were to get in a car accident or something. The one that made me cry the most was the other night when I started to think about what I would do if Zach were to die soon. It's a morbid thought, but I think about it. I think about how sad I would be. This then leads to me thinking about if I were to die soon. I think about all the people I would affect. I then think about how lucky Chrissy and Suzie are to have each other, which makes me sad to think about how much everything has changed. I start to think about the future too and wonder if patterns repeat themselves. Will my husband die too soon too? This, of course, makes me think of Zach again, because- another confession- I would love to marry him somewhere down the line (not any time soon, thank you). He makes me unfathomly happy, and to think of a life without him makes me sad all over. I guess this leads me to something else that makes me sad. The other day I got sad when I saw my dog being all happy, chewing on a rawhide bone. Crazy, huh? It made me sad that something so simple could make her so happy. It made me think of my mom and how happy it makes her to go out to eat with me, just to spend a little time with me, and then it makes me feel guilty about how crappy we treat each other. I love her, but it's so messy that it's often disguised as bitter.

I'm such an emotional mess. Luckily I took a break when writing this so I wouldn't start crying. I don't know if anyone else's thought process goes like this. I think that I think too much, wouldn't you say? One might ask why I share such things sometimes. I'm responding by saying that it makes me sad to think that no one will know me at all. Even my closest friends. I'm sorry that I open up through a blog and not in person, but that's just not the way I'm made. People always seem to blog that they hate to blog, and that's their thing, but I think it reveals a lot about someone. They're afraid of hurting people or getting hurt, but I think that if everyone were to open up through some medium, they would be a lot happier. I think that with each confession I might make, it's just one thing I've gotten off my chest, and it will eventually lead me to get out of the depression that lurks around inside me. I thought I was over the seasonal depression, but lately I'm on cry mode, but now you all know about it and it makes me feel a little better, which is great because I love laughing 5 quadrabagillion times more than crying.

"...the years go on and we're still fighting it..."

What has happened since we last met?

We had one last "girls night" before we parted to our various schools. It was a mini party for Stephy as well. Speaking of her- her birthday is tomorrow. Happy 20th! *muwah!* Amy Gep came along because the boys were having a gameing night, and the girl needed some fun. Because, let's be honest, games that our beloveds play are only fun to them and other nerds. She's a really sweet girl and I think we need to hang out more. She's so cute and shy that I can't help but grin when I'm around her. My friends didn't scare her, so that's good. After Stephy's partita, she, Jessica, and I went to see Mona Lisa Smile. It's a super wonderful movie. Me likey long time.

School started today, and I really have to agree with Mike Hagan when I say that financial aid sucks. I haven't been screwed over once the entire time I've been in college, but this semester I was raped. So, I guess I was signed up for too many credit hours to get financial aid. HOWEVER, they did not tell me this. I never got anything in the mail that would suggest that I needed to pay for my classes. I never got a book check, so I went in to see what the problem was. After 70 hours of waiting, that is what I learned. I have 57 credits- one class away from graduating. Financial aid won't pay past that, but yet they won't pay for just one class. Ergo- I had to pay for one class myself. I couldn't pay for all of them, so I had to drop three and end up just taking one. What a waste of space I am! By the end of it all, I'm so frustrated that on the way home, I start crying. When I get home, my mom actually takes up a mom position (wonders never cease), and said that if I wanted to take any of the classes I had to drop, that she would pay for it. She would pay for the books too. I hesitated and was stubborn for awhile, but admitted that I did want to take the drawing class. ~I ended up staying in the design class, by the way~ We head back to school to get me back in the class, but find out when we get there that someone was on the waiting list to be in the class and was put into it because I had dropped. Pissssssoff! Luckily, we talked some people, my mother did her schmoozing as she does so well sometimes, and I got back into the class.

In conclusion, I am taking only two classes again at RCC. What a slacker.

I have this song in my head, and I think it's lovely so I'm going to share:

Do you realize
That you have the most beautiful face?
Do you realize
We're floating in space?
Do you realize
That happiness makes you cry?

Do you realize
That everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your good-byes
Let them know you realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do you realize?

Do you realize
That everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your good-byes
Let them know you realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do you realize
That you have the most beautiful face?

Do you realize?

"Do You Realize?", by The Flaming Lips


goodbye

Kellisa Humphreys's birthday was Monday. I know that once upon a time she used to read this, but I don't know if she still does. Just in case: Happy Birthday, Kellisa! I hope you had a great 21st. I haven't forgotten about you and still think about you often.

I haven't gotten to see everyone as much as I wanted to this break. Boo to that. School starts Monday, too. That's bunk. I have to be there at 9 in the am everyday. It's my fault. I brought it on myself. MWF it's a drawing class, and TTh it's a design class. I am creative, I'll give myself that, but I don't know about being able to draw. One time I drew and painted the Cheshire Cat and it looked awesome, but that's about it. A fluke now and then is all the talent I have when it comes to that.

Melissa Keathley is taking photography next semester! If you need anyone to volunteer to roll down a hill, I'm the girl for you, Melissa. =)

Mike Hagan promised a party, but he has not followed through. I'm dissapointed in you, Mike. I was expecting more.

so this is the new year.
and i don't feel any different.
the clanking of crystal
explosions off in the distance.

so this is the new year
and I have no resolutions
for self-assigned penance
for problems with easy solutions

so everybody put your best suit or dress on
let's make believe that we are wealthy for just this once
lighting firecrackers off on the front lawn
as thirty dialogues bleed into one

i wish the world was flat like the old days
then i could travel just by folding a map
no more airplanes, or speedtrains, or freeways
there'd be no distance that can hold us back.

there'd be no distance that could hold us back


~Death Cab for Cutie~


My new year's event was spent with Zach, Jared, BJ, and Nick Stolle. It was a good time, but I'm sorry, boys, it still wasn't nearly as fun as last year. Too much sausage, not enough tang. Last year was the best one I've ever had, and it's going to take something spectacular to top it. I miss my girls, is all.

Like the song, I have no resolution. I made a joke one by saying "I resolve to not get knocked up". I'll think of a more realistic one some day...

I would do a recappy cap of 2003, like I did with 2002, but I honestly can't remember many details. It was a grand year, with more ups than downs, so that means that things are getting better. So much better than 2002. Damn do I still hate that year. Alright, so here 'tis:

~The Ups and Downs of 2003~

January-
up: Aaron Stanley has me run money at the Sadie Hawkins gig at the door with Zach Schultz. Thank you, Aaron!
down: Zach is still dating Kasey [insert smirk here]
up: Zach dumps Kasey [insert giddy dance here]
February-
up: Zach asks me out on February 18th (after the whole hanging out, pre-dating thing for what seemed like forever)
March-
up: Chrissy and I take a road trip to nowhere and back, but dang was it fun! =)
April-
down: one-year anniversary of Dad's death
up/down: I turned 20. That's old.
up: Zach turned 19. He can go clubbin' now!
May/June-
up: road trip with Zach. It was a blast, yo.
down: working at the zoo just isn't as fun this year
up/down: I get rid of those damned wisdom teeth, but I get a dry socket. Oh the agony!
July-
down: TWO WEEK vacation w/ ma and sis
August-
down: started third year of Richland Community College. I'm a loser.
up: six month anniversary with Zach! That's a crazy-long time, yo.
September-
up: where, oh where have the morals gone?
down: we put Grandpa in a nursing home because no one is home often enough to take care of him
October-
up/down: last year of BATZ. *tear*
down/up/down: sprained my ankle at BATZ, but I didn't have to pay for it, but I did have to go to physical therapy for 3 weeks
down: my dog, Bud, had to be put to sleep. It was the first time we've ever had to do that...
November-
up: I go to visit Jessica and Stephy in the same weekend. Fun was had by all.
down: Mother and I get in the biggest fight ever. I start hyperventalating, I'm so mad.
December-
up: working at Suncoast
down: PAUL JACKSON!
up: Zach's band's first rock show wasn't too terrible
up: getting to keep my job at Suncoast


That's all I've got. On to new things (this is an emensely long blog, by the way...yikes):

28 Days Later is wonderful.
Willard is a creepy-ass, but enjoyable movie.
Valley of the Dolls is an excellent book.
The Infinity Room rocks my panties. Sound and looks...ooh dang.

"...and where was I before the day that I first saw your lovely face? ...now I see it every day."